Embrace Your Softness: Why Feminine Energy is a Superpower (and Chivalry Isn't Toxic)

This morning, as I savored my coffee in quiet contemplation, my thoughts drifted to the fascinating, often misunderstood, dance between men and women – specifically, the currents of masculine and feminine energy. I truly believe that energy permeates everything around us, a subtle yet powerful force shaping our interactions and experiences. It’s this underlying vibration that makes us 'click' with some individuals and, at times, clash with others. This led me to ponder the distinct ways these energies manifest and are expressed within our relationships.

As women, we undeniably possess the strength and capability to tap into our masculine energy. We can be assertive, driven, and take charge. Those who know me personally can vouch for my tendency to lean into this more often than I'd like. I'm a self-proclaimed 'one-woman show,' a habit I'm actively working to soften, as I rarely ask for help (a challenging but necessary personal growth area).

However, beneath that independent exterior lies a deep-seated part of me that genuinely delights in embodying my feminine spirit – in softness, receptivity, and grace. Despite my strong opinions and fiercely independent soul, there's a profound appreciation for the simple gestures of traditional chivalry. There’s a warmth in a man holding the door, a gentle consideration in him pulling out my chair, a comforting reassurance in a loving hand-hold accompanied by heartfelt words of affection.

A couple of years ago, this very thought played out in real-time. My daughter and I were walking into a restaurant, a few steps behind three young men. Not one of them paused to hold the door. In that moment, I saw a perfect 'teaching opportunity' – not just for them, but for my daughter too. I leaned down, speaking loudly enough for them to hear, 'Never give the time of day to a man who doesn't offer to hold the door for you. Chivalry will never go out of style.' I snuck a glance at the young men; their expressions told me the message landed.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be on the receiving end of that care and attention. Let me repeat: There's nothing weak about wanting to be feminine. In fact, I believe it's deeply empowering. Women deserve to be celebrated, loved, and cherished, and I believe men possess an innate, primal sense to offer exactly that.

Think about those ingrained instincts, those subtle societal cues that carry a deeper energetic meaning. When walking alongside a road, isn't there an immediate sense of security when a man instinctively positions himself closer to the traffic? It’s a silent, protective gesture. Consider the simple act of holding hands: his right hand gently enveloping our left. Is there not a feeling of him offering his strength, his giving energy, to our receptive side? I’ve always perceived these gestures as quiet expressions of love and care, tangible ways in which healthy masculine energy offers support and security to feminine energy.

It's disheartening to see these beautiful acts of simple chivalry, these authentic offerings of masculine energy, increasingly mislabeled as 'toxic masculinity.' This rebranding feels like a fundamental misunderstanding, a sweeping generalization that overlooks genuine intention and the natural, healthy dynamic of giving and receiving that can exist between men and women. True masculinity, in its healthy form, is not about dominance or control, but about strength, protection, and a deep desire to care for and cherish. Similarly, true femininity is not about weakness or dependence, but about grace, intuition, receptivity, and the nurturing power of receiving.

How do we create a world where both energies are truly valued and celebrated for their unique contributions? A space where a man can express his strength and protective instincts without fear of being condemned, and where a woman can embrace her softness and receptivity without being perceived as weak or subservient. It’s about recognizing the inherent beauty and power in this natural polarity and celebrating the harmonious dance between these energies.

Let's reclaim the understanding that it's okay for a man to be masculine – to offer his strength and protection – and equally okay for a woman to be feminine – to receive that care and offer her own unique gifts of nurturing, intuition, and grace. It’s in this balanced exchange, this respectful interplay of giving and receiving, that relationships can truly flourish and individuals can feel fully seen and appreciated for who they are.

Now, I want to hear from you. What are your thoughts on the giving and receiving of energy in relationships? Do you think chivalry is outdated, or a timeless expression of genuine care? Share your perspective in the comments!